You ever have that feeling when you just don’t have anything to say? I think that was 2016 for me. Instead of having an opinion about everything that happened in 2016, I was a spectator. Anderson likes to tell me that I am a mute. Gabriella tells me that I ask a million questions, yet when it’s reciprocated, I am very guarded in my response. It’s not that I don’t have much to say, trust me that is not it. Rather it’s because I like to hear a good story.

We all know 2016 was probably one of the worst years for many. Honestly, on December 31st, 2015, I really thought 2016 was going to be a great year. I should have known better when we brought 2016 at a local dive bar that only took cash.  “It is my year” was chanted everywhere. But really, I truly thought is was my year.

How could it not be? I started a new job that I actually liked. I opened my own art studio by myself with my name on it. I went to Harry Potter World in Orlando. I mean really, where could it have gone wrong aside from the laughable American election that shocked the whole world?

Here is a list of pros and cons of each month in 2016:

January

Pro: We went to Harry Potter World! It was a wonderful time. We wore super cool shirts that said “LV” as we were followers of Lord Voldemort.

Con: The Republican Party. The Republican campaign. Syria. David Bowie died. Professor Snape died.

February

Pro: Beyonce released her song and video for “Formation”. I actually cared about the Super Bowl because she was performing.

Con: People were offended by her video and performance because she did something crazy. She represented her heritage and was taking a stand from the ongoing violence. Could you imagine someone doing that in America? Shocking. Honestly, I just thought it was a performance.

Oh, and the Republican Party. The Republican campaign. Syria.

March

Pro: The best month ever! My birthday month! We went to Hotel Chantelle in the LES and had a lovely time, from what I can remember. Anderson hosted her first gala in Boston for her foundation, The Sumaira Foundation.

Con: I started to realize working full time and owning a business will take me away from my friends and family. I had to remind myself it will all be worth it in the end.

But of course, the Republican Party. The Republican campaign. Donald Trump. Ted Cruz. Syria. Sudan.

April

Pro: I decided that I will need to go out during the weeknights in efforts to stay socially equipped. I actually overcame FOMO, and decided if I/others want to hang we will make it work. If not, it is what it is. I guess that’s part of growing up.

Con: LEMONADE. Of course the actual material is not a con, but my reaction definitely was. When we were watching, we didn’t know what we got ourselves into. We didn’t see it coming. HBO and Bey really shook us. It was so personal that I took it personally. My male co-workers till this day remember the day-after, and how I was so mean to all men. It was just a natural reaction. To think Jay cheated on Bey! How are the rest of us safe?

You know it. Donald Trump. Aleppo. Prince died.

May

Pro: I started and finished my third piece to my collection of art pieces. It’s known that if I was a religious person, I would probably adhere to Buddhism as it makes the most sense to me. Thus, I created my ideal Buddha.

Con: I got really invested in Game of Thrones to catch what all the hype was. And to my surprise, I was into it. Maybe too into it. I have a hard time to separate my reality from my dreams, so this show didn’t help.

I don’t have to mention it again. Let me add “more shootings” to that list. Harambe.

June

Pro: My love for Japan grew more and more as this country was becoming crazier by the second. Japan looked like a better place for me to live, but easier said than done. Instead I decided to recreate a delicious Japanese snack, takoyaki. To my surprise, I did a pretty good job.

Con: Unfortunately, the election became a bit too real and talking about the election with the other party supporters became a feud than an educated conversation. Trump supporters wanted something “different” from a politician (to think, it’s American politics), yet could not state one policy. The con comes to play where I started to move away from such supporters in my personal life. Not because they believe in a different political ideology because that has yet to be proven by the candidate, but the whole campaign was a scare tactic against people like me.

The list remains the same. Orlando shooting. Mohammad Ali died.

July

Pro: Went to Newport, Rhode Island for a fantastic bachelorette party. I actually didn’t realize we were going there until the day before when I received the address. I thought we were going to the Hamptons the whole time. It’s my fault. I didn’t read the number of emails that had the address listed.

The great thing about this bachelorette party was that it was more like a big slumber party with your friends. We rented a house, had a few activities, went to a winery, had lovely dinners, braided our hair, and went on a boat. Life gets in the way of life, and I found this bachelorette party a relaxing and genuine time with one another. It was different from the wild ones I’ve been to.

Con: Ugh. I can’t say it again.

August

Pro: Anderson and I went to Chicago where she was giving a speech as Miss Bangladesh USA. I’ve never been to Chicago or a pageant before. Even though I don’t take Anderson seriously 85% of the time, it was wonderful to see her speak such powerful and inspiring words to young girls alike.

Con: Unfortunately, while I was there, I only got to explore parts of the city. I wish I was able to see more of the windy city, but I was only there for one full day.

Omran Daqneesh.

September

Pro: Banks, the singer, came out with an amazing album, Altar. It so is dreary and beautiful that you cannot help but to feel her pain. Went to Beyonce’s concert that blew my mind. Attended a lavished wedding with an amazing live band.

I started to attempt to go from medium brown hair to caramel blonde. Transition in process.

Con: I am getting tired of naming cons, but as it goes. NJ Transit derailing in Hoboken and the Dakota Access Pipeline issue.

October

Pro: Went to New Orleans for a wild bachelorette party. Attending my first same-sex wedding, which was an amazing time and couldn’t be more excited for my great friend.

Con: While being away in New Orleans, I was made aware that a family friend, my age, tragically passed from an allergic reaction to a spring roll fried in peanut oil at a wedding she attended with her husband. It brought light to how life is not always promised. I wasn’t able to attend the services as I was in New Orleans, but I did visit her family upon my return. Witnessing how strong her husband and family was made me think about how trivial the pettiness of what people, myself included, take so seriously.

November

Pro: I was a part of a pretty wedding as a bridesmaid. I threw out the dress after I wore it because it was ripped up from wearing it all day and dancing. I went away to Sweden, Finland and Denmark. It was an interesting experience going after the election and whole world was baffled as much as I was.

Con: The result of the election.

December

Pro: Bought myself a ticket to Cuba.

Con: President-elect. Christmas market. Turkey

Clearly, I am tired of writing all these pros and cons. It’s bringing me down. So there it is. Is 2017 going to be my year? I am not going to aim so high to say that, but I am hopeful. Do I have resolutions? Sure, but will be kept private.

The question 2016 has left me with is if humans have always been vile and social media just shed light on it? Or has social media changed us into a self-consumed, insecure, opinionated society that feeds off of trying to be on top?

I will leave you with this: my hair super blonde and I am excited about it. 🙂

On aside:: I can’t leave you with a song from Banks. Lucky for me, she just released a new video for a song from her newest album today!