I always wonder what parents think of their children when they hear all of the idiotic things they’ve done. They are definitely disappointed, but they probably question where they went wrong.  Or why they deserve children of that stature when they tried their best to raise good kids?  While growing up, I always felt guilt when doing things I knew my parents would not approve of.  Did that stop me from doing a lot of things? Yes, but for some reason I went ahead and did things I knew that were not appropriate later in life.  It’s known I am no angel, but I chose not to live with any regrets. I never hide anything.  With that being said, my parents and sisters are aware of the choices I have made in the past. Again, I have never done anything that was hurtful to anyone else or such.  The same can’t be said about people I’ve met throughout my life.

When I first went to college, I was completely different from how I am today. I went to a high school where I thought all of society acted the same way as we did in my town. Our high school ran on a hierarchy system where different cliques held different classes of importance.  High school was such an unimportant time in my life, but during, that was the only thing that mattered. I was judgmental, was very particular who I would befriend, so on and so forth. Today, I would not be friends with my high school self.

Going into college, I acted the same way. It took me a while to go beyond the bubble that I formed around me. Finally when it happened, I made the greatest friends one could ask for. I love to learn about people and their experiences and get an understanding of the real world and what is out there. However, it came with a price.

I guess I let my guard down naively and was friendly with people who like to take advantage of others.  Freshman year, I became friends with these two guys who were on my floor in my dorm. They happened to be best friends from a nearby town from the school.  Miguel and Jiggies are awesome guys. I knew immediately that they were genuinely nice people who had good hearts. Till this day, we remain friends.  We all became friends and enjoyed each other’s company. Now, what I didn’t foresee is that being friends with them means you become friends with their town. I didn’t mind it. Like I said, I like meeting new people and learning more about them.

While growing up in my town, I developed a trust in everyone. It suggested that people wouldn’t harm others, especially me unless I did something to them.  Stupid?  Hell yes!  The summer after freshman year, I decided to throw a house party at my parents’ house.  It was a fairly large house that I stupidly used for a reckless party.  You know in Mean Girls how she expected a few but a bunch showed up, that’s exactly what happened.  There were about 200 people who came in and out that night.  It was fun but it came with a price.

I invited all; people from high school, college and friends of friends.  Big mistake!  The cops came, but they were no help.  They should have broken up the party but they didn’t.  Rather, they asked me how old I was and if it was my place.  The one time I was hoping they would break up the party, they didn’t.  On the back deck, there was a bag of charcoal.  Not realizing, people were stepping into it and then dragging it into the house. The living room had a very white carpet down.  To your surprise, it was black by the end of the night.  The grout in the kitchen was no longer white.  It took me weeks to clean out the charcoal with a toothbrush.

Aside from the house being a mess, I woke up to the worst thing ever.  Someone went in my room and stole my laptop, digital camera and cellphone.  The laptop was fairly new.  I got it for college along with the camera.  All my years of having parties, I never thought to hide my belongings.  I guess that was my fault to assume people were good.  I questioned people who I was friends with, but never thought of the obvious; people I didn’t know.  Not only did I disappoint my parents, the whole family dynamic changed after that party.  I was no longer trusted.  For the first time in my life, I was grounded (while being college).  My sister was mad at me for dragging her in it. (She was the one who covered for me while I had the party.) My relationship with my father altered severely, not that it matters today, but then it did.  My priorities were questioned and not taken seriously.  I was on a tight leash that summer.

As far as my stuff, I found out who stole it a year later.  That most aggravating part of this all is the fact this douchebag, Doug (real name), would be at parties and would act like he did nothing wrong.  No remorse, nothing.  That’s the scary part; that people of that nature exist.  What makes a person do bad things to others?  To be cool? Outgoing? To seem crazy? Because none of those apply to him.  If people did think that, they need a new hobby.  Once I found out, he cried to me how sorry he was and made up a story how he was saving money to pay me back.  It’s five years later and there is no sight of that “money.”  I don’t need the money.  It is the fact that this guy actually went out of his way to steal over $1500 worth of electronics to sell for $100.  Complete idiot.  I would have bought it back for that much if I knew that.  I would at least respect him as a smart thief if he made legit money from it.  Even as a scummy thief, he can’t perform (and other ways, as I hear).  The angst that he caused is unaccountable.  The sad part is that people I am friends with know what he did, yet still hang out with him, some even have sex with him. GROSS!

You grow from the people you meet.  2012 is a year where I dispose people who I don’t need to associate myself with.  I am 23 years old and I think I know what type of people I need to surround myself with.  I must say, I gain much satisfaction when I realize where this low-life is in his life and where I am.  I am not usually judgmental but this circumstance is vastly different.

On a lighter note  This French group is great!  It reminds me of college (the good times) because I was obsessed with this group.  Enjoy!