Free Drinks!

I hope everyone’s Halloween was a blast. Despite the weird snowstorm, I hope everyone still skankified their costumes. Sorry I haven’t blogged this week, I was too busy getting my life on track, which it is with great success!

I went out in Philly for Halloween and I had great time. I went out with all my girls and we were clownin’ around town. It was a great time. I was Scar but I looked like a depressed lion, probably because I was hanging out at the Elephant Graveyard too much. Geri was your typical pirate and her boyfriend was a sheriff who lost his badge and cowboy hat. He ended up being a guy with a flannel shirt. Katrina was a NASCAR driver (I think). Camille was Medusa which was pretty neat, but she was too busy doing the dirty on the dance floor. Jenny was a 70’s go-go girl with biker shorts on which she lost by the end of the night. Last but definitely not the least, Alaina came up with the creative idea to be a candy corn, except I thought she looked like a mustard bottle with the tip all crusty. GOL. Regardless what our costumes were, we all maintained to clown out.

Unfortunately, my employer likes to pay us once a month, thus I am forced to budget for the whole month. I was ballin’ on a budget. For us girls, our pre-game becomes our party and our after party is the bar/club we end up. But don’t you worry, we have a party after the after party, for those who can last (I didn’t).

By the time we got to the bar/club, I was feeling really good. I go up to the bar to get a drink. I always buy myself the first drink. I hate girls who wait around for a guy to buy them a drink. Guys have to save money too you know. Unless there’s a good chance your panties are going to drop, don’t have a guy buy you five drinks and then disappear. How rude?

After a few drinks, I was dancing around. I love to dance; no doubt about that. I hate when random dudes think its okay to rube their boners up on your butt. Seriously, hop off it! I’m not going to lie. I have dirty danced on the dance floor, flipped my hair like I was Britney Spears, and Jersey Turnpiked (I try to avoid that move at all costs but sometimes it just happens in the moment). When I go out to the clubs, I am not looking for Mr. Right, I am looking for Mr. Right Now to dance with and not pop a semi. Friday night, I just wanted to dance around with the girls and meet some people. That definitely happened.

Things get hazy around this time. Katrina was talking to a girl and showing her the ring on her finger. It immediately caught my attention. I don’t particularly like diamonds because the way they are found, but DANG was her rock big. Next thing I know, I am talking to this newly engaged couple. They bought me mad shots and drinks. I don’t know why, but I did not hate it. Remember, I was ballin’ on a budget.

This happened to me a few times before. I meet couples and then they buy me mad drinks. Alaina likes to think that they are trying to have their way with me. Who knows? Maybe they are intrigued by me because they are unable to figure out what my ethnicity is, and they have a bucket list. Whatever it is, I don’t feel bad getting free drinks from couples. When someone buys you a drink you are obligated to talk to them for at least two-five minutes, so you don’t seem rude; that goes for each drink. When a couple buys you a drink, you can talk to them if you want, but you can go dance with someone and not feel bad for the person who bought you the drink because they have each other.

ADVICE: If you are ballin’ on a budget and are out at a club, find a couple and chat them up. They will buy you drinks, and then you can go find your man piece without hesitation and have self-confidence boosted from the alcohol. BAM!

Also, Jay D, my life assistant, helped me find this song that I am completely obsessed with. The beat is too HAWT! I did not realize they were a bunch of middle schoolers singing, but it’s real good!

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