Honestly, it was news to me. Not in the sense that I didn’t know what it means. Rather what having it implies. For those who does not know the acronym, it is short for Big Dick Energy. It isn’t about male genitalia. It’s not about inches or girth. Instead, it’s the well-endowed self-confidence that doesn’t define your values.

So what does that mean exactly? Literally, it is the epitome of complete security. The vibe that you don’t need to compare benchmarks to know your worth. I mean BDE sounds like the best case scenario for anyone, male or female. It isn’t dick-dependent. It doesn’t come with a cocky undertone. So why does it come with negative connotation when a badass bish has BDE?

Big dick energy is a metaphor, however not value-neutral. Recently, I was watching Younger, and BDE and dating apps came up. Apparently, giving off BDE on an online profile is threatening to a man. Okay, maybe not threatening, but challenging.

First, let’s review what exactly gives off BDE on an online profile:

• JOB: Titles that you’ve worked hard to acquire. Rightfully so!
• HOBBIES: Things you like and actually do during your spare time that aren’t the norm.
• TRAVEL: So you have been places aside from Thailand with your other BDE friends and lived your best life? (BTW – I have been to Thailand and loved it.)
• MUSIC: Connecting your Spotify and sharing your music is quite personal. This is a big deal for me because I live to experience music from an array of genres.
• PICTURES: This is a given.

All of these together can equate to the ultimate BDE. However, the one men truly judge your BDE on is your job. Your job defines where you lie on that spectrum. Your job is a very large contributing factor to BDE on an online profile. Remember, this is all at face-value, so this is all what is seen and analyzed.

Apparently, having a job that means something throws off your BDE. I asked a few friends that are on dating app scene, and it is said to be true. Saying you are an “Engineer” gives off the ultimate BDE versus “Project Manager”. Not saying the Project Manager title is less, but to men, apparently it falls short on the BDE spectrum. Others have completely changed it to avoid creeps to find them on LinkedIn. LinkedIn? Come on, guys! If Insta and FB aren’t working, get a hint fella! But that’s for another blog.

I decided to run an experiment.

• Week 1, I used my real title, which most definitely gives off BDE. Meh on hits. I was being picky forgetting this is an experiment. Either way, results were not as robust as the next two weeks.
• Week 2, I used a title that wasn’t a lie, but wasn’t the truth. It was a dialed down version of the truth. Things were picking up. More engagement. In a weird way, it made me feel better, even though I knew my job title was a factor.
• Week 3, I used a complete arbitrary title. It’s actually something I would love to be; an artist. Out of all the three, this received the most hits.

So what does this mean? Lie till you trap a guy? Wait till the guy mans up? Get a time machine, go back to college where you find your mate with your innocence, trap them and then show them who is boss?

The truth is hiding your job title doesn’t actually take away from the actual BDE you have. Either way, in real-life, if you got it, you’ll naturally flaunt it. I know more females to have it than men.

Let me leave you with this; I have only met a few men in my life that actually had genuine BDE. Big Dick Energy is so powerful that you’ll be enchanted by their aura. That is when you know that they know who they are and own it. Rare, but it’s out there.

On aside :: I love following artists through their journeys. Jhene Aiko is an artist that has a voice like honey and lyrics that are lethal. This is her latest, and seemed very appropriate for this post. It is very 90s in the best way! Enjoy!